Just ask her: she'll tell you she's not a baby.
Tonight as Sara walked from the bathroom to her bedroom after her bath, I was overcome with thoughts of the baby girl that once required such delicate handling (especially when wet) in order to get from one place to the next. The one who took delight in being bundled in a towel and snuggled tightly after bath. The girl walking in front of me tonight was talking the whole way, giving opinions about which books to read, and acknowledging her daddy's sneezes with her own little "achoo". And delicate handling? What's that? She brushes off a slip here or there without hesitation.
My brain tells me that she's growing and developing just as she should, and there certainly is relief in knowing that she's normal, healthy, happy. It's just that tonight my heart is already aching for the baby she was not so long ago. It thrills me to watch her become a little girl. I love listening to all she has to say, I'm amazed at the things she knows, and I'm delighted that she brings laughter to each day. And though she'll always be my baby, she's growing up too quickly, and she already knows that she's not a baby. It brings happiness and heartache all at once. A contradiction, indeed.
5 comments:
I totally get it. Yesterday at school Liam went over to this baby and he was trying to rock it in its car seat. He looked like such a giant next to this tiny baby and it reminded me of when these "big" kids would do the same thing to him! It wasn't really all that long ago.
Katie,
I totally know where you are coming from. Our babies just don't stay babies for very long and soon enough they are mouthy, drama filled teens. As much anxiety as I have had knowing that another one is on the way, I tell myself that I get to do the baby thing again and someday I will cherish having a big family. Lyndsey has totally captured my heart and has starting saying love you when you say it to her and what better thing is there in life than that. Enjoy every minute and hug her lots, won't be long when they are too "cool" for that!!!
You wrote it so well! I still look at Payton and wonder where the past three years have gone. Although I am over-the-top in love with both my babies, it does bring a tear to my eye to know that she is now the BIG sister, no longer a baby.
Take care!
she is growing so very fast. Enjoy every minute because the time does go very very fast.everyday is a great new gift they learn so much everyday.
She is more beautiful with every hour,day that passes.Love Grandma B.
I got a little teary-eyed reading this post, Katie. I feel that way about Ellyson already, and she's only six-months-old! So proud of the big girl she's becoming, but a little sad to lose that itty bitty, totally dependent baby!
You're a great writer, and I always appreciate your perspective on motherhood!
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